L'Shana Tovah!
To all the Jews (probably only people who read this) L'Shana Tovah!High holiday services at Rodef Shalom, well let's just say, sometimes not my cup of tea.
I know every temple works differently, but its like everytime I walk into a service I know all I except is our amazing cantors showing off their voices, not letting anyone else sing. Now your thinking, damn thats harsh, but let me explain myself.
I love my cantors. Don't get me wrong on that. They are amazing people. They have even more amazing voices. But personally I'd like to sing along and connect to a service instead of hearing how high they can sing. I mean, sure every once in a while I get that, but its sure not often enough for me. But yet, I go almost every Friday possible. Why?..you may ask. Because of the communitas. (community) its the kehilah kidosha. Its a beautiful thing. I feel so warm and happy everytime I enter the temple. Its the people around me who make me feel amazing. Sure, I may not always connect to the service, but at least it puts a smile on my face.
I know personally I'm going to lead services differently when I'm a cantor with whoever my rabbi is. (probably a best friend from Kutz!) I love being a jew, especially in this reform movement.
Which reminds me of an arguement that I had with one of my good friends. About how I'm too "jewish" for the reform movement. How I'm more of a "Jew" then any other reform Jew. Because I wear tzit tzit, have a passion for learning, want to be a cantor, and so much more. This upsets me. I try so hard to explain to her how being a reform Jew you have so much CTK (Choice Through Knowlage) type things. She just won't get it. I'm sure she will one day. I mean, its great. I actually am in love with it.
As for me, my Judiasm is not doing so well. I have't had a good connecting service in such a long time. Because if I was to keep standing during the V'havtah today and start to daven, people would stare me down and be like..what is she doing? There for I just be upset, sit down, and just chant like everyone else. As frustrating it is, thats one more service I got through, until one day I'll be a cantor, with my own temple, of our own customs. My father keeps telling me how I won't be like that, and everytime my mother yells at him because she knows how my temple will be. And my father dreams that i will have a temple of the one i want. Ohh how I love my family.
Even though all the hard times. Maybe in a week it won't be so bad. At least thats when the shadow moves out of our house. ...hmp.
L'Shana Tovah, and Lilah Tov!
posted by Rachel @ 6:23 PM
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